BLOGHUNGRY

Recipe For The New Mariah

I have heard the new Mariah Carey album and figured out the real formula for her new album. Forget "E=MC2", just take Fergie and add a dash of Tyra.

Blueberry Cupcakes w/ Blueberry Cream Cheese Frosting

As soon as I heard this song in 2003, a margarine spread commercial started playing in my mind. I pictured Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow sitting and buttering muffins from a tub of butter substitute and singing to each other. In honor of them and buttered muffins everywhere here is another muffin turned dessert recipe by Bloghungry. For the fans of my stellar video scripts, I am posting the outline for the video that I pictured at the time. 

"Pictures" Script Outline fo Sheryl Crow/Kid Rock

Enter on Kid Rock rolling out of bed in a trashed hotel suite. Surrounded by empty bottles, he stumbles out of bed and to a glass door with the drapes closed. He picks up a broken framed picture of Sheryl lying on the floor.

Cut to Sheryl seated on a patio table singing and sipping coffee. She is surrounded by a backdrop of grassy vineyards or wheat fields and is painted in the golden light of a sunrise.

Cut to Kid pulling back the hotel room drapes, opening the sliding glass door, and walking out to a balcony sunrise. He clutches the picture and sits at a table on the balcony.

Cut to Sheryl and pull back to reveal that she has been sitting next to a giant wall of blueberry muffins. She pulls a muffin from the wall and butters it with a knife from her tub of margarine.

Cut to Kid to reveal that he is sitting on the other side of the giant wall of blueberry muffins. He pulls a muffin from the wall opening a hole to reveal that Sheryl is sitting on the other side.

Cut to Sheryl realizing that Kid is present and accessible on the other side of the giant muffin wall. Wide shot to reveal the two feverishly pulling muffins from the wall, buttering, and eating them. With each bite they become more intoxicated with love. The muffin wall collapses and they fall into each other's arms surrounded by muffin carnage.

Blueberry Cupcakes w/ Blueberry Cream Cheese Frosting

6 premade blueberry muffins
1/4 cup butter @ room temperature
6 oz cream cheese @ room temperature
1/8 cup sour cream
1/2 cup blueberries
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 16oz pkg powdered sugar

Beat the butter, cream cheese, and sour cream together in a large bowl until light. Add the blueberries, vanilla, and sugar, mixing well until fluffy. Spread over premade blueberry muffins and keep refrigerated until serving time.

4 Minute Banana Cupcakes with Banana Cream Cheese Frosting

Recently in a late night dessert panic, Bloghungry baked and iced a 2 layer chocolate ricotta cake with homemade vanilla buttercream from pantry to plate in about 30 minutes. In honor of the new Madonna/Justin Timberlake song 4 Minutes. I attempted to throw together a banana cupcake with banana cream cheese frosting in just 4 minutes. It took a little longer than 4 minutes, but only because I used a pastry bag.

Also, Bloghungry has a hobby of scripting out music videos for songs while sitting in L.A. traffic. I've done it for years and I fully believe that if Brittney would have just called me for her last few videos, her career and life would be in a better place right now. Here is an outline of my thoughts for the Madonna/J.T. song.

Bloghungry's "4 Minutes" Video Outline:

Enter on Madonna (lip-syncing) being wheeled down a hospital hallway on a gurney as she extends in Top Modelesque poses. A 4 minute digital countdown clock begins in the corner of the screen.

Cut to J.T. (lip-syncing) in GQ doctor fashions walking in a hurried runway walk down a hospital corridor. He busts through some double doors.

Cut to Madonna (lip-syncing) sprawled out on an operating table in heroine chic awkwardness as her clothes are cut off her by sexy mod nurses to reveal bathing suit-like unitard. Sexy mod nurses circle around in a medical dance panic.

Cut to J.T. (lip-syncing) scrubbing his hands, putting on gloves, etc. and bursting into the operating room with Madonna. He rushes to her side and they both lipsync as he is operating on her general midsection in no specific way. Sweat drips from his brow with great intensity as sexy mod nurses dance around and are sprayed with Technicolor blood and medical fluids originating from Madonna's general midsection. The nurses turn into an orgy on the dance floor as the surgery becomes more heated. The clock in the corner of the screen counts down to zero and Madonna's monitor flatlines. J.T. hangs his head as Madonna and the sexy mod nurse orgy lie lifeless.

4 Minute Banana Cupcakes with Banana Cream Cheese Frosting

6 premade banana muffins
1/4 cup butter @ room temperature
6 oz cream cheese @ room temperature
1/8 cup sour cream
1 banana mashed
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 tiny dash nutmeg
1 16oz pkg powdered sugar

Beat the butter, cream cheese, and sour cream together in a large bowl until light. Add the banana, vanilla, nutmeg, and sugar, mixing well until fluffy. Spread over premade banana muffins and keep refrigerated until serving time.

BH Birthday Mix

Tomorrow is my 28th Birthday. Stealing from the tradition of Popmuse, this year I am making my own birthday mix cd for all of you to join in the celebration of my birth. If you want to be a part of the magic even further, tune in tomorrow for my birthday cake recipe.

Download BH Birthday Mix here

Birthday Mix CD

My friend Kelly's birthday is today. To celebrate her ongoing transformation into adulthood I made her a mix CD. This CD is a love letter of sorts to the cinematic housewife makeovers of the late 80's/early 90's. Put on a homemade puff-painted t-shirt and listen to it at your next Jazzercising class.

DOWNLOAD "You Go Girl" HERE

Breakfast with Pornstars

So you have a group of gay porn stars staying over and you aren't sure what to feed them for breakfast. Bloghungry has your back. I spoke with some of the stars present at Los Angeles' Gay Erotic Expo recently to discuss breakfast food favorites. Here is a rundown of some the sexworker's most wanted morning eats:

Blake Riley: Peanutbutter and Chocolate pancakes
Josh Weston: Cereal
Ethan Reynolds: Yogurt parfaits
Benjamin Bradley: Ethan's cum

The Bloghungry Sex Tape Scandal

To Whom it May Concern:

I would like to release a statement about the alleged Bloghungry sex tape that has been circulating from my cleaning lady's blog. My family and I have been shamed by my cleaning lady's disregard for my privacy and we urge you not to visit her site or search for the video on youtube. As an international gay food blogging celebrity it is very important for me to set and uphold limits on my personal exposure. Without these limits, I am nothing more than a trashy dry-hump artist pushing Paula Deen's Bananas Foster recipe. Thank you for your loyalty and support.

Yours in Gay Food Blogging,

Bloghungry

   
Paula Deen's Bananas Foster

1 stick butter
1/2 cup brown sugar
4 bananas peeled and halved, cut lengthwise
1/4 cup dark rum

Melt butter in a large skillet. Add brown sugar and stir together. Add the bananas and cook until caramelized over medium-high heat. Pour in the rum and catch a flame off of the gas stove or a BBQ lighter. Stand back when ignited and flambe. Be careful; a flame will shoot up above the pan. Let flame die down. Serve over vanilla ice cream and/or a slice of pound cake.

Bloghungry Episode 1

This is the first of many Bloghungry episodes to come. Each episode will parody a different t.v. show, movie, or music video and will feature a different Bloghungry featured recipe in action.

Chocolate Creme Fraiche Pot

2 1/2 cups creme fraiche
11 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped
Whipped cream, for serving
Cocoa powder, for serving

Put the creme fraiche into a medium saucepan and place over medium heat. Stir until it begins to bubble and add the chopped chocolate. Stir well until the chocolate melts and the mixture is smooth. Pour into 8 souffle cups and chill, covered, for 2 hours. Serve with a dollop of whipped cream and a sprinkle of cocoa powder.

Dinner Party Music

The must play song for gay hipster dinner parties this season is here. It's called Dinner Party and is available now on a new self titled album by Dirty Sanchez. It also makes for good listening on your way to work or while taking shirtless pictures of yourself in your bathroom mirror.

Listen Now: Download 03_dinner_party.mp3